Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Transcendence

A funny thing happened to me on the way to the September marathon.
 
At some point in the past week, I've stopped caring so much about wordcounts (daily or otherwise), targets, and deadlines.  I've been hacking with abandon, cutting huge chunks of scenes, rewriting extant bits before my "scheduled" rewrites timeframe, perfectly content with hours of work and only 300-500 words to show for it, and blissfully blowing off every goal I've set for myself.
 
Which is not to say I've given up or don't care about the book or my goals, no no.  And it's not to say I'm not making progress; I am! 
 
I just feel...transcendent, almost.  At peace.  Like I'm floating along.  The book has taken over.  I don't have to flog myself with deadlines to make sure I keep moving forward on it.  It's moving under its own power now, slowly but surely, and I know that if I just go along for the ride I'll get to the end.  And it won't take killing myself to do so.
 
I have this mental image of a roller coaster.  Up till now, I've had to do everything for myself: I made myself get up and leave for the amusement park, I bought my ticket, I walked to the ride, I waited in line, slowly moving forward - but under my own power.  Now I'm seated and strapped in, and the thing is moving, taking me with it.  Clickety-clack, slowly forward and up, inch by inch along the track toward the top of the ride.  The pace is slower than I might like, right now.  But some part of me knows that eventually, inexorably, I will reach the top of that hill and gravity will take over and suddenly I'll be flying down the other side.
 
Which is probably terribly cheesy, and I know I'm rambling now.  Don't mind me.  *g*
 
I haven't been blogging as much, or checking in at the forum, but I'm still here.  I'm writing every day - a lot or a little, determined by the story.  I'm making progress.  And somehow, I'm managing to get more sleep and actually accomplish some housework in the deal.
 
This is going to be an interesting ride.

1 comment:

Carol A. Spradling said...

Hi Jenny,

Good for you! Don't get caught up in things of relative unimportance. It's more important to write a good story.